On the Road to Compassion

The daily commute - I would guess that just my mention of it has perhaps got you clenching you teeth and your shoulders are finding their way to you ears! The commute for many has become something so stressful and something we have to do twice a day. And for some people they're commuting and doing the school run, the pressure on us looms large every morning.

People are now travelling further than ever before and there's more people than ever on the roads,  on bicycles and using public transport. So I thought it helpful to think about how we can help ourselves and others to make this experience a less stressful one. By extending kindness to each other we can reduce our own suffering and the suffering of others and we can bring a more compassionate and positive start to our day.

Here are some ideas of how to bring compassion to your commute:

1. Let someone go in front of you in a queue
2. Smile at others
3. Give people space and time to make decisions when in your car
4. Try not to react aggressively if someone pulls out in front of you or walks in front of you
5. Be kind to yourself if you make a mistake, like stalling you car or missing your train

These are just very simple ideas and things I've felt more motivated to do lately as I practice bringing compassion for myself and others into my life. I'm sure you will think of many more. The opportunities to extend kindness to one another seem to know no limits once we create compassionate connections with our selves and others.

What's not as simple is how to become driven to behave in this way. I mostly drive around like I have to defeat every other commuter to get to work on time driven by the internal flight or fight pathway so many of us know so well. But in the moments I've had where I stop this mindless behaviour and behave with kindness have become more frequent as I begin to understand more about compassion and actively practice bringing it into my life.

Meditation has helped me foster a more compassionate stance and helps me understand my own internal suffering so much better. This moves me to recognise suffering in others and act to relieve it. So when I'm in my car I notice the troubled expressions of those around me, I see the tension in their eyes and the anguish and exhaustion on their faces. And I recognise this same suffering in myself. I feel a sense of concern that we feel we have to battle to work in this way. I bring to mind the potential effects of this behaviour, from the stress we then carry into the rest of our day, having detrimental affects on our health if left unaddressed, to more immediate negative consequences such as road rage altercations and accidents due to aggression or lack of awareness. I see that we're all pulled in a million different directions by our stressed minds, unable to negotiate the challenge in front of us. It leaves us feeling depleted and frustrated.

An understanding of the true implications of our commuting behaviour on ourselves and others, in all the far reaching ways, helps us to see the great benefit of change and the need to change. It helps us challenge the thought that tells us we have to get to work on tine at all costs and it refocusses our attention on more mindful behaviours.

Imagine if we could sooth ourselves and others by cooperating and collaborating on our commute? Helping each other onto trains,  leaving gaps for each other in our cars and thanking each other for our kindness. I bet we'd get to work quicker and happier!

Compassionista x